"Somethin' stinks! It's not poop or pee. It smells like....tractor dust."
I want to be 66 someday..."
"If you don't stop I am going to sit on your head. And I am not joking or kidding." when I kept trying to tickle him (It would have sounded rather ignorant is he hadn't been laughing so hard he could barely get it out
"I don't poop in my pants. I just toot in my pants."
"If I eat all my pancakes I'll get big like Daddy, and then I can use grown up scissors."
"A cheeseburger with SPRINKLES!" when he saw the sesame seeds on the bun
"I'm going to go cry where you can't bother me!" - the best threat I have ever heard
We're going to chalk on the driveway." - I just like that he uses chalk as a verb
"It's not poop.' - while eating refried beans
"It's not a full moon tonight. It's a banana moon." - while looking at a crescent moon
"Way to go, Twinkle Toes." - I have absolutely no idea where he heard this
"I'm not running! I'm slippering!" - when he was told to stop running in the house with his slippers on
"I don't want sunglasses. Sunglasses make the sunshine go behind a cloud."